They Call Me Pastor

Tomorrow morning, I will preach my very first sermon as Pastor of Harvest Church of the Nazarene. I can't even believe myself as I type these words. For the last 3 ½ years, Heath and I have only served in interim and pulpit-supply type roles. Most of the time, we have been really good laymen, and it's sort of surreal in a way to be back in the office.

I didn't come to this decision lightly. When I started as interim at this church back in October, my mind was made up that I wasn't looking to pastor again. In fact, repeatedly, the subject came up about me being their pastor, and even the District Superintendent called to ask my thoughts about a possible permanent relationship. I turned all of them down flat.

I mean, honestly, it just didn't make sense. This wasn't on my radar at all. I didn't think my family was in a position yet to approach the subject of entering full-time ministry again, and I didn't even think I was a good fit for Harvest. They're great people. And that's just the problem. They're grounded, solid, mature Christians, and I've never started with a group of people this strong. Where could I take them? And then, there's the culture thing. I'm just a country-girl from a little community in Mississippi that nobody's ever heard of. We don't even have our own zip code. I'm naively old-fashioned on a lot of things, and I just felt like they needed somebody...smarter, more knowledgeable about leadership, more trendy on the ways that churches are nowadays.

And then I started reading, and searching, and praying. And as the months passed on, the door just was left open. They interviewed several people, and they even liked them. But each time, something happened, and the door was shut with those people. But with me, it just stayed open. Still, I was hesitant and scared. I've never pastored without Heath, and I'm...well...a woman.

Nevertheless, I agreed to an interview, and in the interview, the board voted unanimously to recommend me to the congregation for a church vote. And at some point, "I accept the nomination," escaped my lips. Excitedly, they asked, "What do we call you?" And it was decided that they would call me, "Pastor Susan." Until that point, I didn't realize how much I'd missed that title. Pastor.

Oh, how I love these people. From the day that the Lord and I settled it that I was willing, and He is able, my heart has been bonded to them. I love them. I pray for them. I believe in them. My desire is for them to succeed at living up to their name of reaping the Harvest. And with all my heart, I promise to be the leader that God desires for me to be.

How did this happen? And what have I done? These are both questions that have crowded my mind the last few weeks as I have not-so-patiently waited to start my new role. Since my heart has been changed, my mind wasn't so quick to respond, and the enemy has plagued me with inadequate thoughts once again. But I know what God has done in my heart. And I know the steps He has taken to bring Harvest and me to the point where we are.

Without me asking, God has graciously put three households in my presence this week that Heath and I had the privilege of pastoring in the past. As we have visited with each family, my thoughts flood back to the past and the roads we walked with each of them. Their stories were not always pretty or easy, but it was my honor to walk beside them, encouraging them and pointing their attention to the Father. Look at how God encourages and reminds of how He has and can use me again!

And I'm thankful. I'm grateful. And I'm excited.

He never has failed me. To God be the Glory!